Per my usual, it’s the end of the month which means it’s time for the monthly wellness roundup post. If you’re not familiar, every Wednesday of each month I write a wellness/wellbeing post that’s centered around self-development and motivation. I also focus on a specific topic for the month. Last month’s topic was Relationships but I did not do a wellness round up last month but you can read the post HERE, HERE, and HERE. For this month my topic was centered around Self-Respect. I thought it would be a great idea to do a round up post at the end of the month which entails me providing the highlights from the topics I wrote about each week for that particular month. Consider it a one stop shop if you will, for those who may have missed a Wednesday post, or if you need a refresher or a boost to help you get through.
For the month of December I talked about self-respect; what it looks like, what it is, in addition to a host of other things that fall under self-respect. I chose to focus on self-respect because it was a request made by someone who follows me on Instagram.
Last month I focused on relationships and I may have shared that one of my social media followers asked for more relationship advice. Well she also mentioned self respect and stated that no one talks about what it looks like and I thought it would be a good blog topic to focus on because I’m sure a lot of people feels the same way she does. This month’s title is kinda different right? I decided to go with this title because the follower I mentioned earlier said no one talks about what self-respect looks like. Reading her statement made me agree with her and I started to think bout what self-respect actually looks like.
There Is No “Look” there isn’t. Self-respect is not an element we can google and hope to find an image that we can mimic. Self-respect is a behavior (or an act if you will) and like most things it takes time to develop. It shows when we refuse to accept disrespect from others, when we choose not to engage in things affect our well-being and our happiness, and when we choose to do what’s best for us even if the other person doesn’t like or agree with our decision.
It’s Isn’t Putting Someone Else’s Needs Before Yours this is similar to what I mentioned above but there’s a fine line here. Yes we should make sacrifices for those we love when it’s necessary but it shouldn’t affect our well-being to where we start questioning who we are, why we’re being treated this way, why this keeps happening, etc. It also shouldn’t bring us to tears, especially if the tears is a result of us being in agony from holding things in for so long.
There are a lot of people who are unhappy and instead of creating their own happiness, they try to find happiness in other people (specifically in romantic relationships). Break ups are never easy but if you’re reaction to the break up is dangerous to yourself or the other person; there is something much deeper than the break up going on that needs desperate attention. But, again, the lack of self-awareness and operating from a specific accord clouds your judgement around this issue. While the methods I’m about to share won’t change your behavior overnight, it will hopefully open your mind to some possibilities.
SPEAK UP if you’re naturally shy this might be a bit difficult but I read a quote once that said “say what you feel, even if your voice shakes.” Standing up for yourself (even if it’s for something small) is a clear sign that you have respect for yourself and that you know your voice and opinion deserves to be heard. When you do this the other person may not like it; just remember that you’re not responsible for their reaction to what you shared especially if it’s shared with love and from a place of kindness.
DISAGREE SOMETIMES you don’t always have to do what the other person wants to do; especially if what they’re suggesting makes you uncomfortable. Please don’t fall for this “if you love me, you’ll do….” it’s a trap, that’s not love. People who love you won’t ask you do something you don’t want to do especially if it can cause harm in anyway.
Unless you have a good grasp on it, self-respect can be some what of a challenge to obtain and trying to cultivate this feature can sometimes cause our voice to shake if we’re trying to stand up for ourselves, it can cause us to be fearful and scared when making the choice to do what’s best for us, and it can feel like we’re not making the right decision if making a choice can cause us to lose someone who we love. Self-respect may not come easy but it’s absolutely necessary. Here are some of the reasons why I think self-respect is really important.
It’s an act of self-love there is no greater love. I’ve mentioned self-love many times in some of my blog post throughout the year. When we love ourselves we automatically attract the right people in our lives and if they aren’t the right ones, we know it and it’s usually easy for us to walk away. Additionally, the right person not only values the respect you have for yourself, they encourage it.
It means you’re being seen and heard a few of the most important factors in life for all beings is feeling seen, heard, and valued. One of the main ingredients of self-respect is the ability to stand up for yourself—this might mean saying no, doing what’s best for you, making a decision that some people may not like, and choosing to walk away from something or someone who does not serve your overall well-being. Being able to do any of these things says a lot about the amount of respect you have for yourself.
This will likely be the last Wellness Roundup post on my blog because if you’ve been keeping up with my post, then you’ll know that I’m still trying to figure the direction for 2022. I will not be posting bi-weekly but the blog will definitely stay active. If you have any ideas, leave me a message.
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