Although I have no problems being social, for a long time I identified as introvert because I THOROUGHLY enjoy spending time alone. It’s how I rejuvenate and recharge, and hanging out with people is fun but equally as draining, and I could (and still can) only deal with people in bouts. Not too long ago I learned about the term ambivert; if you’re not familiar, an ambivert is a person whose personality has a balance of extrovert and introvert features. As mentioned previously, hanging out with people is a lot of fun but I need time alone to recharge. When I’m around others (especially for an extended period of time), I find it difficult to focus on myself or my wants and needs and the consequences I deal with when I don’t make time for myself often times is projected on others. In essence, finding the balance is crucial for me.
Of course there are folks who fall on either side of the spectrum; completely introvert or completely extrovert and I wanted to create a blog post around social self-care that caters to those whose social preference are likely often neglected or forgotten about when it comes to planning events or spending time with others. I can’t speak for all introverts but I do believe that there is a way to cater to their specific needs in social settings. This post is primarily centered around ideas you as an introvert can use when you’re considering making plans to spend time with others. Similar to last week’s post, these challenges aren’t necessarily challenges that are created to be conquered in one week, they are ideas that you can use if you’re trying to plan to spend time with your friends.
Work Within Your Comfort Level one example of this would be if you’re invited out for dinner, maybe show up for dessert if you think it will be difficult for you to make it through an entire dinner without feeling overwhelmed. For those of you who are questioning the etiquette of this option, I hear you, but I think it’s important for us to understand that everyone’s comfort level and boundaries are not the same. No one should ever be in a situation where they feel completely uncomfortable after an extended period of time. That’s not emotionally healthy.
Opt For A Virtual Event this option has become incredibly popular since the start of the pandemic and it’s the perfect opportunity to link up with friends and family who are out of the country or state, and for the people in your life who’s generally too busy to make time to spend quality time with their friends. I think virtual events creates an opportunity for introverts to still be in the comfort of their own space while still spending time with friends and family.
One On Ones if you have a difficult time with group outings another option would be to have one on one time with each of your friends. If your friends know crowds aren’t your thing, they will likely understand. You can do things like make dinner for them at your home, schedule a massage, or go out for manis and pedis.
Schedule Events That You Like To Do I don’t think this is selfish (especially if it’s done sporadically). You can do things like attend a gym class together. Another workout idea is to take a Peloton ride together. I don’t have a Peloton bike but a friend of mine told me that she has a group of people that she “rides” with. I’m sure anyone who owns a Peloton knows what I’m talking about.
Invite Friends To Your House similar to the virtual gathering, this is an opportunity for you to be social while being in the comfort of your own home. If you like to cook, prepare an elaborate dinner or you can make it a girls night and order take out, drink wine, watch movies, and enjoy time with your friends.
Go Out this is not really the best option for an extreme introvert but this option may work for some. Creating a balance is important and even though you may prefer to spend time alone, spending time outside the house on occasion creates that balance. I also think that if we expect our friends to respect our preference we have to be willing to do the same for them. In other words, sometimes we have to take one for the team.
Make Suggestions this is an opportunity for you as an introvert to make suggestions that will cater to your specific lifestyle. This doesn’t mean that everyone else won’t be happy it just means that with everything that’s planned, you will get a chance to do something that you know you will enjoy while hanging out as an introvert.
After creating this week’s post I’m questioning whether the options I’ve provided are really self-care ideas. I do think that quality time and spending time with others can be a form of self-care; especially if you gain some form of a fulfillment from spending time with people who mean a lot to you. So while these options may not be manis/pedis, massages, etc. Dinner, conversations, laughter, and other social activities can be a form of self-care; especially if it makes you feel good about yourself.
Self-Care on the go are essentially bite size versions of my self-care challenges. It’s open to anyone but it’s specifically created for moms and other working women; who may not have time to participate in all (or any) of the challenges that I provide weekly because of their mommy duties or busy work schedule. You can access the infographic HERE. I’ve been posting them every Sunday since the beginning of the year and I really enjoy creating them. If you’re one of my readers who participate in, or enjoy these options because you find them convenient, leave a comment and let me know what you like about them or what you think I should change. Thanks for going on this self-care journey again with me this week.
By the way, if you’re interested, my Newsletter and Self-Care Accountability Worksheet is now available. The worksheet will act as a supplement to my daily self-care challenges. The purpose is to help you stay on track with your daily self-care routines. If you’re interested in receiving these items weekly, email me at firstname.lastname@example.org. The self-care worksheet is FREE, but will only be available to my Newsletter subscribers. I will NOT spam you, I will only email once per week.
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